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Grief and Bereavement

The experience of loss and grief is a universal human phenomenon. Our culture provides few ritual practices to guide the bereaved through this process. In addition there is often a conspiracy of silence where close friends and even family may hesitate to speak openly about the deceased to avoid “upsetting” the grieving person. Continue reading Grief and Bereavement article»

See also Death and Dying; Self-Esteem and Assertiveness


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Recommended Self-Help Books on Grief and Bereavement

The Bereaved Parent
Harriet Schiff

This classic book has helped thousands of parents navigate through the difficult years following the death of a child. Schiff offers her own experiences and the experiences of other parents with funerals, protracted grief, the need for support from other bereaved parents, the complicated feelings of guilt and powerlessness at being unable to protect or save one’s child, and the effects on marriage and surviving siblings. 
1977, Crown

Beyond Endurance: When A Child Dies
Ronald Knapp

The author interviewed 400 families who have experienced the death of a child. He presents the unique and common experiences for three types of death: death after a long illness, sudden or accidental death, and death by murder. He covers the grieving process, dealing with the hospital, and coping behavior and provides suggestions for mourning parents. 
1986, Schocken

Death Be Not Proud: A Memoir
John Gunther

During the months of his illness everyone near Johnny Gunther was unforgettably impressed by his level-headed courage, his wit and quiet friendliness, and above all, his unfaltering patience through times of despair. This deeply moving book is a father’s memoir of a brave, intelligent, and spirited boy. more
1998, Perennial

A Grief Observed
C. S. Lewis

This powerful memoir recounts the crushing grief and spiritual questioning of C.S. Lewis after his wife’s tragic death. It is a moving account of the inner turmoil and overwhelming vulnerability of grief. The book is a beautiful and unflinchingly honest memoir of how even a stalwart believer can lose all sense of meaning in the universe, and how he can gradually regain his bearings. 
2001, HarperSanFrancisco

The Grief Recovery Handbook: The Action Program for Moving Beyond Death, Divorce and Other Losses
John James and Frank Cherry

The authors present a five-step approach to grief recovery including awareness of grief, accepting responsibility, identifying recovery communications, taking action and moving beyond loss. They understand grief as a growth process and offer an authentic and accessible plan for recovery from loss. 
1998, Perennial Currents

Healing After the Suicide Of a Loved One
Ann Smolin

The survivor of a person who has ended his or her own life is left a painful legacy: grief, depression, guilt, rage, despair. Healing After the Suicide Of a Loved One steers the reader away from the torture of self-blame and points to the path of healing and recovery. Filled with case studies, valuable advice, resources, and a directory of suicide support groups nationwide, this valuable book lends the reader strength and hope to go on living. 
1992, Fireside

Helping Children Grieve: When Someone They Love Dies
Theresa Huntley

This book guides parents in helping their children cope with death. It uses a developmental approach explaining how children of different ages understand death. The author gives sound advice on how to talk about death to children. 
2002, Augsburg Fortress



How to Go on Living When Someone You Love Dies
Therese Rando

This highly recommended self-help book covers a wide variety of grief circumstances. Rando describes a number of ways to cope emphasizing that there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Each person’s response to loss will be different, and the book helps the reader to understand and resolve grief, talk to children about death, resolve unfinished business, accept help and support of others and get through holidays and other difficult times of the year. 
1991, Bantam

This book was a Pick of the Month! Read David's full
Book Review.



How to Survive the Loss of a Love
Melba Colgrove, Harold Bloomfield and Peter McWilliams

This best-selling book has helped people cope with many types of loss: tangible losses – the death of a loved one, divorce, robbery; intangible losses – moving, surpassing a goal; age-related transitional losses – leaving home, aging, menopause; being in limbo – awaiting the outcome of medical tests, going through a lawsuit, having a loved one missing in action. There are many short chapters, each of which addresses an aspect of loss and healing. 
1993 Prelude Press

In the Wake of Suicide: Stories Of the People Left Behind
Victoria Alexander

In this book are breathtaking stories of incredible power for anyone struggling to find the meaning in the suicidal death of a loved one. After author Victoria Alexander’s mother took her life, she spent the next ten years collecting these stories from people like herself who have walked through one of life’s most difficult journeys. The result is a beautifully written book of powerful, spell-binding stories told by those who were left behind. 
1997, Scribner

Living When a Young Friend Commits Suicide
Earl Grollman and Max Malicow

The authors offer solace and guidance to adolescents who are confronted with someone of their own age who has committed suicide. They focus on coming to grips with the reality of the suicide, and the need to cope with the experience and to continue with one’s life. 
1999, Beacon Press

Lost Fathers: How Women Can Heal from Adolescent Father Loss
Laraine Herring

Every year an estimated one million teen girls in the United States experience the death of their fathers. Countless more lose their fathers to divorce, addiction, incarceration or abandonment. This authoritative guide for adult women helps you to understand how your behaviors and relationships may be shaped by losing your father at such an important time of your life. With gentle expertise, Herring blends personal stories, up-to-date psychological information and interactive exercises for readers in this healing guide.
2005, Hazelden

Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss
Hope Edelman

This book explores the profound pain of mother loss among women. As Edelman shares her own painful story and the stories of other women who lost their mothers, she describes the secondary effects that may occur, including the girl filling the lost mother’s role at home for father and younger siblings. 
1995, Delta

No Time to Say Goodbye: Surviving the Suicide of a Loved One
Carla Fine

In this comprehensive and well-written manual for suicide survivors, Fine offers advice for those recovering from the suicide of a marital partner, relative, or close friend. She provides insights into living beyond this tragedy, including dealing with feelings of guilt and anger, the stigma of suicide, and financial and legal problems; and she tells where to get help. She stresses that joining a peer support group is an important coping tool. 
1999, Main Street Books

Recovering from the Loss of a Child
Katherine Donnelly

When a child dies the pain and shock can seem unbearable but in sharing, understanding, and accepting this tragic loss, emotional recovery is possible. This groundbreaking book shows bereaved parents, siblings, and others how to cope with the loss of a child. Included are inspiring first-hand accounts from others who have survived this heart-breaking experience. 
2001, iUniverse

Talking About Death: A Dialogue Between Parent and Child
Earl Grollman

This book consists of dialogues between parents and children and includes a children’s read-along section using appropriate language for children five and older. The book also includes a parent’s guide to talking about death which helps parents respond to children’s questions about death. 
1991, Beacon

Transitions: Making Sense of Life's Changes, Revised 25th Anniversary Edition
William Bridges

This revered classic has helped hundreds of thousands of readers cope with change by providing an elegantly simple yet profoundly insightful roadmap of the transition process. 
2004, Da Capo Press

The Widow’s Handbook: A Guide for Living
Charlotte Foehner

This is a great reference book with checklists to help a widow go through a trying time. Included is information on making funeral arrangements, selecting an attorney and financial advisor, dealing with wills, life insurance and survivor benefits and other practical issues facing those newly widowed. 
1988, Fulcrum



Working It Through
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Through words and pictures, this book serves as a testament to the human ability to survive and transcend the most difficult trials in life. It covers a wide range of grieving experiences including emotions, the significance of music, the loss of a child, suicide and spiritual awareness. 
1997, Scribner


The Worst Loss: How Families Heal From the Death Of a Child
Barbara Rosof

Each week some nineteen hundred American families are faced with the death of a child – the most harrowing of losses. Rosof offers compassionate advice to help parents cope. She explains why grieving is crucial to recovery, how the partners’ relationship may be affected, and the ways surviving siblings grieve. The book includes families telling the story of their children’s death and their aftermath. 
1995, Owl Books

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